Soccer Coaching Blog

How To Deal With Soccer Parents

By Admin on December 17th, 2011

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For any soccer game to be successful there should be a friendly relationship between the players, their parents and the coach. Soccer is a team game and it is not possible for players to win games without a joint effort. While this teamwork includes the players, it should also take in the parents as well as the coach.

There are many youth soccer leagues that fail to recognize this. They tend to ignore that if there’s no harmony within the team, the kids won’t feel motivated to work harder and better their game. When the player sees his parents constantly getting into an argument with the coach, he/ she will be distracted, unfocused and will not be able to have fun. It completely ruins the purpose of the drill, or activity. For this reason, it is important to avoid unpleasant situations and it can be done if the parents are notified in advance about certain expectations and rules.

The soccer coaching tips offered in the subsequent paragraphs will help you engage your player’s parents by involving them effectively and dealing diplomatically with problems that they may create. For instance; some parents might want their kid to play more. Then there may be some others who have issues with your judgement as a soccer coach. Practice the following soccer coaching guidelines and bring down the occasions when the coach has to intervene to take care of parents who are upset or annoyed with the game plan.

1. Discuss your game plan, your line of attack as well as your expectations from the team as a whole and individually from the players with respect to practice before hand with the kids as well as their parents. Encourage the parents to have their doubts or issues sorted there itself. Also, make it clear to everyone involved that the practice plan designed by you has been made after much deliberation and it’s best for the kids.

2. Make it a point to listen, consider, and appreciate their ideas, concerns and feelings. Never forget that their interest and concern is genuine because their kids are going to be involved.

3. While dealing with parent’s questions and objections, stay calm and remember that the objectives laid down by you have are primarily in accordance with what you think is best for the players and not for the parents.

4. You must refuse to give in to unreasonable pressure by the kid’s parents. When it comes to taking the last call, you are the final authority to take when it comes to coaching soccer to your young team.

5. Show an equal respect for every player in the team. This will send a message to the parents that they should too look at the team as whole and not individual players. Never discuss individual players with a different set of parents.

6. It is your responsibility to stop the parents from criticizing their kids before everyone. Don’t let anyone including the parents of your players humiliate them for whatever may be the reason.

7. Refrain from changing any rules at the eleventh hour. If there is no option but to make ceratin amendments in the rules at some stage in the season, be prompt in informing the players as well as their parents of the change.

8. Last but by no means the least, be fair. When you pay equal attention to each player in your team it is going to result in you gaining their respect of players and their parents as well.

Before you form an opinion about your team player’s parents being unreasonable, remind yourself of the fact that the parents and the players both from different backgrounds and their philosophy and standards are typical to their upbringing and cultures. This diversity should be acknowledged, accepted, and considered while dealing with them. The most challenging task for a soccer coach is to acknowledge this difference and positively address these diversities to make the season as enjoyable as possible for each one involved.

Communicate! Most parents would prefer to stay on the ground to watch the game. Show your acceptance to this by taking their services in a situation like this. Request them to keep offering drinks to their kids during the breaks. Make them understand in a positive way to cheer their kids from the sidelines but at the same time, avoid giving negative comments against other players.

It would be in the best interest of a soccer coach to inform the parents about dealing with problems that might show up before, during or after the match. For example: tell them not to get into a detailed dialogue with the coach prior to the game because there’s a lot of anxiety in the atmosphere during this time. Tell the parents to avoid any discussion with the coach during the game as well as immediately after the game gets over.

In fact, they should be guided to first check with the manager if they have an issue and make an effort to sort out that problem. If the issue still remain unsolved, they have the option of writing an email to the coach. Let me offer you a quick tip; in case there is a personal issue that needs to be fixed, call for a meeting and let the soccer parents fix the required appointment ahead of time. This delay in making arrangements, calling people, and waiting for everyone to gather may cause the problem to solve on its own once logic and judgement kicks in.

Behave in a mature and a coach like manner. As a youth soccer coach you should know how to handle soccer parents while staying composed and respectful in the meetings. Listen to the problem carefully and offer an objective solution to get rid of it while remaining unbiased. If you lose your temper and choose to be critical of the individual player or his/ her parents, it’ll only lead to disagreements, personal grudges and differences.

Since you are a mentor to an entire team, you should be cautious about what you say and also your behaviour. When reviewing your kid’s performance, add a positive comment at the end of your statement. For instance; young players often make mistakes but they are quick to learn from them, which helps them a great deal in their future.

When you see that it’s only one set of parents who is constantly coaching his kid from the sidelines during the match, call for an immediate meeting thereby requesting all the parents to be there. When you do this, it will enable you to address this concern without pointing out any particular set of parents.

Then when everyone is present, you should explain why it is so important to follow this rule. Make them understand that their kids are bound to get confused if they keep on hearing different sets of instructions during the game. This will even affect their ability to take decisions during the match as they’ll keep waiting for someone to instruct them when in a problematic situation.

You as a coach and your player’s parents need to realize and remember that when it comes to professional soccer players, they are very serious about their game. They have mastered their playing moves over the years. On the other hand, young soccer players who are learning to play just want to have fun. So you must explain this to their soccer parents because they would surely support their kids and wouldn’t go against the wishes of their players and the coach.

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